Jun 1, 2013

We did make a good peeecture

I woke up this morning with a pair of turquoise blue eyes piercing into my own. I couldn't tell
how long he had been up and been looking at me but I know it was a matter of seconds before my eyes would start welling up.

"Morning love, did you sleep well?" I asked him

"I deeeed but I weesh I hadn't. I meessed you". He answered with a kiss.

And with that, we got lost in another moment, manic laughs interspersed with controlled tears, knowing that this was going to be short-lived. Too painfully shortlived. And as all beautiful things are ephemeral, this one was right on top.

As I went down to make some tea, he got busy with packing his things, doing last minute checks etc.

I wanted him to stay, for another lifetime, but I knew all I could bargain for, was a few minutes.

"Your flight doesn't leave until 3 hours later. You'll get your packing done in 15 minutes. It'll take you 45 to the airport." was the best I could manage. He smiled that impish smile of his, hugged me again and just remained, for a few minutes. I know he was right even though he didn't say anything. When have we been able to control the cruel games time and distance plays on our lives and makes us mere slaves of them? It wasn't the first time I was saying a goodbye to one of the best things that has happened in my life.

The perfect weather outside today added the ultimate irony to the situation and we stepped outside to the terrace to relive a moment from just a week ago, on the same spot, where from the safe haven of this balcony, high above the world beyond, fire crackers going off in the sky in the distance over all the city lights- probably an auspicious day for weddings- the muezzin calling out the prayers from the nearby mosques, under the full moon,  he had perfectly read my thoughts & said "It's a magical night, for us".

After a few more bittersweet goodbye hugs, he...left, taking a part of me with him, leaving a part of him behind. All I could do was stand back, absorb the totality of the event and already start missing him.

The mind flashed back to just weeks ago when I saw him for the first time in office, singing an Opera song in baritone, in a team meeting (!) and knowing intuitively that, here was a person who would come to mean a lot more beyond the realm of work and office cubicles. After a long time I had looked forward to going to work again, steal those glances across our desks, inundate him with gyaan on Eendia, hear endlessly about Italy from him, do good on my roles of his self-appointed tour guide, a colleague and perhaps, something more.

I reflected on our moments together, on cracking up on his adorable Italian accent, ("We made a good peeecture!", "Whaaat does it happen?"), having endless conversations about the most random things in the world, watching thousands of glittering lights down below in front of us from the majestic balcony of the Falaknuma Palace and helplessly blushing everytime he said "You are beau-tt-iful" .

I dream of all that could have been if he didn't have to leave, I wonder if I'll ever seen him again, and if I did, if it'll be the same and also, if I'll feel the same way for a long time.

Why do good things come to an end? Why is transience a function of beauty?
Why do we meet people that we'll come to want only to have to let them go?
I'll probably never have the answers.

All I know is, that right now I hate that the world is so big that people who want to be in it together still have to live in separate worlds of their own.






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